Breaking Free from Society’s Expectations and Finding Your Tribe

Published by karen on

finding your tribe

In a society that often values conformity and fitting into predetermined molds, it’s easy to feel like an outsider or like you don’t quite belong. The truth is, humanity is beautifully messy and diverse, with each individual possessing unique qualities and strengths that defy neat categorisation. In this article, we explore the importance of embracing your true self, finding your tribe, and challenging the harmful judgments that hinder our sense of belonging and self-worth. By breaking free from societal expectations and cultivating self-acceptance, we can embark on a journey towards discovering where we truly fit in and fostering a deep sense of fulfillment and happiness.

Where Do You Belong?

We generally prefer things to be nice and tidy, with everyone fitting into a neat little box. But the truth is, humanity is much messier than that. Some of us just don’t fit in, and unfortunately, we’re often pushed aside or ostracized for being different.

Even if you do fit in somewhere, you might feel like you don’t quite belong in certain groups or situations. And then there are those who just can’t seem to find their place anywhere, which can be a very lonely experience.

But here’s the thing: you should never compromise who you are for the sake of fitting in. Focus on the relationships that matter to you and let go of those that don’t celebrate your true self. It can be scary to be yourself, but it’s so much less exhausting than pretending to be someone you’re not.

Finding Your Tribe

It’s about finding your tribe – those people who truly support you. Whether it’s joining a group online or offline that shares your interests, you’ll be amazed at how much camaraderie and encouragement you can find.

Besides the usual feeling of not fitting in, there’s a whole host of other ridiculous judgments that exist – homophobia, racism, sexism, ageism, elitism, and the list goes on. These judgments make people feel like they don’t belong or aren’t acceptable to others. Unfortunately, we all judge others to some extent, but the best thing we can do is try to stop.

When we accept others, even if we don’t completely understand them, we’ll find that they start accepting us more too. It’s easier to brush off other people’s judgments when we have confidence in ourselves. But a lot of us tend to believe what others say about us, which can make it really hard to feel like we’re good enough.

Feeling a sense of belonging and self-worth is crucial for our personal identity, and it can have a big impact on our overall happiness and well-being. So let’s work on being more accepting of others and ourselves, and try to break down those harmful judgments that only serve to separate us.

Still Being Yourself

When it comes to “fitting in,” it’s important to understand that everyone is unique and has something valuable to offer the world. You don’t need to conform to anyone else’s expectations or try to be like someone else to be accepted or loved.

It’s also important to remember that it’s not just about fitting in with others, but also finding where you fit in with yourself. This means understanding and accepting your own values, beliefs, and goals, and feeling good about who you are as a person.

Finding where you fit in can involve exploring your interests, seeking out new experiences, and building relationships with people who share similar values and goals. It may also involve developing a sense of purpose and meaning in life, whether through work, volunteering, or other activities that align with your values and interests.

Ultimately, the key to finding where you fit in is to focus on self-awareness, self-acceptance, and self-love. By embracing your unique qualities and strengths, you can build a sense of self-worth and belonging that is not dependent on external validation or approval.

Tips to increase your self-esteem

• Participate in activities that you enjoy

• Spend your time with positive, supportive people

• Be kind to others

• Don’t compare yourself to others

• Exercise regularly, eat healthy food, and get enough sleep

• Believe in yourself – don’t let others treat you with disrespect

• Develop life skills, such as assertiveness or mindfulness

• Challenge your negative thoughts

• Affirm your positive qualities and skills

In a world that often pressures us to fit into predefined boxes, it’s crucial to remember that our true value lies in embracing our authentic selves. The process to finding where we truly belong starts with self-acceptance, self-awareness, and self-love. By learning to let go of the need for external validation and surrounding ourselves with supportive individuals who celebrate our authenticity, we can build a sense of belonging that transcends societal expectations. As we break down the barriers of judgment and prejudice, both within ourselves and in our interactions with others, we create a more inclusive and accepting world. So let us celebrate our differences, celebrate our quirks, and celebrate the beautiful messiness of humanity.

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A fifty-something woman who is passionate about living authentically and writing. Author of Coming Out Coming Home.


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